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The Drunken Observer
sometime in the early morning on 1/14/05by OC Rambler
So, I was going to write this article about Bron-Bron and the Cavs after Kobe went down, because I was sure that Kobe acting the candy-ass would open the door to Cleveland's ascent to the top of the NBA tonight.
Yeah. And Loyola is going to win a close game this year.
First off, Crazy Hands. We've been calling Anthony Smith that FOR FOREVER, because there's no way he's only been at Loyola for four years now. He's been playing since the mid-seventies, I'm sure. But who the hell was that tonight? That was AWESOME. 18, 8, and only TWO -- 2!?!?!?!? -- fouls in 30 minutes (ok, he should have had a third when he laid out that dude with a few seconds left at the end of regulation, but still -- that's like, a NORMAL GAME FOR A GOOD PLAYER. Amazing. I'd bet those numbers are probably about what even-crazier-hands Antoine has for his career. Anthony needs to put out that kind of effort every night; he was even setting traps for guards up at half-court, and not fouling. Simply dumbfounding.
Second. Uhhh, guards? Hello? Guards? Our front court was solid; Twin was great, the team force-fed Blair, who played solidly (when he learns to hit the mid-range jumper, look-out), and Schilb played his typical good game (although, he'll be great when he doesn't have to run the point as well as play forward), but our guards played miserably. Majak was nowhere to be found. Telander apparently has Corey Minnifield disease (play only when you're getting your dunks on a regular basis; or, in Te's case, the three). Chris Logan seems to be allergic to shooting. Pierre was a non-factor. Wow, that was a struggle. Not that I'm begging for Dajuan to come back or anything crazy like that, but it would be nice to see a guard put up about 10 points and make a few plays. Might not happen this year, though.
So, in review, screw the White Sox and their convention, and GOD I hate Assler. That was easily the worst Bulldog team in the past seven years, and they still beat us. That sucks. Also, Kobe is a criminal, and huge baby.
There is no booze-tastic moment in history, because we're looking towards the future tonight. Saturday, baby. Bring the noise. Classless. Bachelor party. Bus. Fifty drunken Croatians. Hilarity ensues. The Drunken Observer of all Drunken Observers will follow.
Previous Columns:
The Drunken Observer - 1/07/05
The Drunken Observer - 1/05/05
The Drunken Observer - 12/05/04
The Drunken Observer - 11/07/04
Big Joe's Two Shots and the Ball - 12/29/03
Big Joe's Two Shots and the Ball - 12/22/03
Big Joe's Two Shots and the Ball - 12/15/03
Big Joe's Two Shots and the Ball - 12/08/03
Big Joe's Two Shots and the Ball - 12/01/03
Big Joe's Two Shots and the Ball - 11/24/03